In what was considered perhaps the most successful launch since Challenger, the Game Boy arrived in 1989 with 9 of the most Sought after titles in the history of loading data onto Game Boy cartridges.

And now, in the final chapter of Game Boy Month, which has spanned an incredible 3 months (Part I, Part II), we look back a the top 10 games in a year in which only 9 were actually released.

10) Inserting the proper amount of batteries in the proper orientation.

This title speaks for itself. We’ve played it on countless electronics, but it’s never been as fulfilling as loading the Game Boy with its 37 AA batteries.

9) Alleyway

Some may recognize this game as Atari’s Breakout, or Taito’s Arkanoid. The key difference between those games and Alleyway is the title. This game is called Alleyway, not Breakout or Arkanoid. Understood? Good.

8) Boxxle Soukoban

Make your way through a labyrinth of bricks toward the ultimate goal of world domination in this mix between Battle City and every single platformer ever released. Ever.

7) Castlevania: The Adventure

For the handheld release of Castlevania the developers decided to change the formula and add in an adventure. The idea was unheard of at the time, with most ‘games’ consisting of recipes or crocheting tips.

6) Fist of the North Star   

Playing Fist of the North Star, or fisting in the hardcore community, has never been so easy or so accessible. Now you can fist on the bus, at the doctor’s office, or even at school!

5) Double Dragon    

Now with twice the dragon of the console title Lone Dragon. Only a calculator as powerful as the Game Boy can render two player-controlled characters on screen at the time, on top of one another, making it the first two-player single-player title.

4) Kwirk

Like a snake, this game sheds the skin of ‘being a game’ and exposes the beautiful scales contained within. One part ‘bricks’, and two parts ‘ scores’, this game has it all. Except a game.

3) Super Mario Land

This game stars Mario Land in his first video game role. Land is a painter who has arrived in a strange world at the bequest of a dragon. Faced with an improbable mission, Land uses all of the tools at his disposal to rescue the queen of Super World.

2) Baseball

The video game that would go on to spawn an entire physical sport, Baseball was developed by Japanese developer NinTenDo, a company known mostly for its line of used panty vending  machines in downtown Tokyo.

1) The Final Fantasy Legend

The last in a long line of Fantasy titles, Final Fantasy Legend ties together the entire series by revealing that every single male protagonist was actually a woman, and that the last fantasy, or Final Fantasy if you will, is a full gender reversal.

Every so often, a title is released that redefines what it means for a series of letters and numbers to be ‘a game’ – Cybernoid: The Fighting Machine is such a game.

After the bottom was cut out of the gaming market’s basket following the release of Super Mario Bros., Konami set out to try to reinvigorate the public’s interest in video games. Realizing the safest way to ensure market stability was to “get them while they’re young” – taking a page out of the book of the Catholic church – Konami designed Cybernoid in order to appeal to not only a broad but also a young audience.

Featuring simple controls and game-play that’s challenging enough to keep seasoned veterans interested but not so difficult as to exclude younger players from picking up the controller and wrapping it around their throats while trying to swallow its small pieces, Konami was successful in achieving their goal.

All hail the savior of the medium.

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Adding to the Travel Around The World From Your Dusty Bedroom genre of toy (originating with the View-Master) these latest Kids allow you to experience most of the world’s stereotypes from the safety of your own xenophobic home.

All of the world’s cultures are represented here. You’ve got Asian, Dutch, Spanish, Scottish, Russian and Latin. That about sums up the entire world.

The timing  of the dolls was stellar – arriving shortly after Cabbage Patch Dolls had lost all popularity and the fad had died. That isn’t to say they didn’t sell well. I believe once they reached the bargain price of three dollars per palette they were sold to the Soviet government who used their heads as improvised ashtrays.

Each doll came in a paper box shaped like a suitcase, and came equipped with the doll’s very own passport. If there’s one thing that made children love the original Kids, it was the government issued birth certificates; the passport was a natural evolution of the concept. Had this series of dolls been a success the next step was giving each doll their very own tax forms to fill  out every year.

In terms of “fun”, the level of enjoyment you gain from these dolls will mainly depend on how much fun you have talking with crude foreign accents. For Yakov Smirnoff it’ll be off the charts, but for the average kid I’d venture to guess these toys were best used as ashtrays.

The commercial for the toy made use of disgusted expressions on American children as they toured the cultures of the world. Thankfully no such adventure is required to give your Geisha Patch Doll a more Americanized personality, albeit with an Asian accent reminiscent of WWII propaganda broadcasts.

An excellent cross section of the world. Finally there’s a means to teach children how strange and uncivilized other cultures are without requiring KKK theory to be taught in schools (outside of Georgia).

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Released toward the end of the Nintendo Entertainment System’s existence, Color a Dinosaur shows us the console’s full potential.

Color a Dinosaur was created with one idea in mind: what would it be like to be back in our very first year of school, back in the days before we could form sentences that anyone might find interesting… before we had any concept of colouring things “properly”.

If that was the goal, then game developers Acclaim have hit a slam-dunk.

Featuring a whopping sixteen types of dinosaur to colour, ten colours and patterns to select from – which can be modified seven times by pressing the ‘select’ button – and a slamming soundtrack, Color a Dinosaur shows us what the NES is capable of.

Without a doubt, this could have only been released for a console that was at the zenith of the gaming world.

…Or perhaps at the bottom. It really could go either way.

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Hailing from the suburbs of Detroit, the Insane Clown Posse is one of the first groups to successfully make the leap from backyard wrestling, and is the focus of this month’s Rising Stars Spotlight.

The Insane Clown Posse, known to fans as ICP, have humble beginnings. Joseph “Ornery J” Bruce and Joseph “Shaggy 4 Dope” Utsler spent their days “wrestling” in suburban backyards on homemade “rings.” But in late 1988, the duo was discovered by Jermaine Dupri, owner of So So Def records. Sensing that these two kids would quickly be snatched up by other “record labels” and – even worse – other pederasts, Dupri immediately signed the duo to his label, So So Def.

The Insane Clown Posse released their first single, “Party at the Top of the Hill,” in 1989. Applauded by critics and fans alike for their ability to combine a punk-rock like protest against Capitol Hill and Reaganomics with smooth rhythm and blues style vocals and song arrangements, “Party at the Top of the Hill” has risen quickly to the top of the charts.

Unfortunately, there has been some trouble over at So So Def since the Insane Clown Posse was signed. Due to concerns over how such a thing could be marketed, label executives decided that the name “Insane Clown Posse” and the face-paint Ornery J and Shaggy 4 Dope donned was “too retarded” to reach the audience and get the sales they desired.

After tossing around the idea of Inner City Posse in order to appeal to a more urban crowd, the label decided on marketing the group as the JJ Boys. After a brief “wrestling” “match” and much controversy among their fans, the Insane Clown Posse accepted this change of name and have decided henceforth to be known as the JJ Boys and accept the clean-cut image associated with the copyright owned by So So Def.

But fans should not fear, as the JJ Boys don’t plan on changing their sound. According to the band, fans can expect to hear the same dulcet tones, pop sensibilities, and love songs written for three-part harmony that won them fans with the “Party at the Top of the Hill” EP on the JJ Boys’ debut full length album.

This album is slated for release later this afternoon, sometime after the JJ Boys enter the studio to record it.

Thin Chen Enter. Corp. and Hacker International have teamed up to revolutionize chess in the same way the toilet revolutionized magazine reading.

Faced with the daunting task of topping the ultimate chess video game, Battle Chess, the developers instead opted to add their own twist to the timeless board game.

To hardcore chess fanatics the game may seem a bit disorientating at first. There are no kings, queens, knights, dragons or orcs. There’s no option available to check your mates, and there is no board comprised of checkered tiles.

There are some similarities, however, including:

• A flat surface

Overall this may be the finest version of chess played using hieroglyphic covered poker chips I’ve ever experienced without a bag on my head.

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